There are lots of times in life when we need lesbian advice, but there’s nobody to ask.
Because not all of us have close lesbian friends we can trust (and our straight friends don’t necessarily always “get it”, and are terrible at giving lesbian advice, even if they mean well…)
When I tell cis-gendered, heteronormative people that I teach dating and relationship advice to lesbians, they very ofen respond by saying “but aren’t we all the same?”
And that’s really sweet… Because their question is coming from an “inclusive” place. I appreciate that, and it’s awesome how far some parts of society have come (where queer culture is no longer seen as “separate”, “other” and “different.”)
But being a queer female isn’t the same as being a straight female.
In fact, being a queer female isn’t the same as being a queer male.
Of course, we are all human, and there are a billion reasons why we are more similar than we are different.
But there are a lot of significant things about the queer female experience that is totally unique and different.
And it’s important to have thoughtful ways of processing and navigating through those differences.
When I was struggling with dating women I felt really frustrated by the lack of resources available to help me.
Advice for men picking up women doesn’t fully apply to queer females (because we’re not men and we don’t have the same drives as men do and queer females don’t relate to each other the way straight women relate to straight men...)
Advice for women trying to find a husband doesn’t fully apply to queer females (because a huge part of their struggle involves “getting the man to commit” and queer females aren’t known for avoiding serious relationships – we are known for bringing a Uhaul to our second date!)
The bottom line is that lesbians need lesbian advice from other lesbians.
That’s why for this episode of Women Wanting Women I’m directly answering audience questions.
(And in all other episodes of Women Wanting Women, even when the guests aren’t lesbians, I ask questions from the lesbian perspective.)
I give a lot of lesbian advice on my YouTube channel, if you haven’t checked that out already.
I talk about the unique struggles lesbians have when it comes to self-confidence, loneliness in lesbian dating, neediness in lesbian relationships, lesbians dating bisexual women, lesbians staying friends with their exes, and how we women can maintain our power when dating other women (even when they try to play games with us.)
The lesbian advice I talk about in this episode is:
Until next time keep remembering that hot lesbians are everywhere, that love is real and that the woman of your dreams is on her way into your life in perfect timing.